Gestures, eye contact and space

Greet, listen and gesture the way English speakers expect. Lesson 15 of 58: Everyday English, CEFR A2.

Eye contact

In most English-speaking workplaces, steady eye contact says honest and interested. Look at the person for most of the time they are speaking, and a little less while you speak, glancing away now and then to think. Staring without a break feels intense; looking down a lot can be read as unsure or uninterested, even where your own culture means it as respect.
On a video call, the camera is their eyes: look at the lens when you say something important.
That makes sense, thank you. (Said looking at the speaker, with a nod)
Sorry, could you say that again? (Eye contact shows you want to understand)
Listening: Head slightly tilted, hands still and relaxed, eyes on the speaker: “I am with you.” Add a nod.
Eyes down: Unsure or uninterested to an English-speaking listener, even when it is meant as respect. Look at the person, or the camera.
Tip: Nod while you listen, and add a word: “Right”, “I see”, “OK”. It tells the speaker you are with them.

At work the usual greeting is a handshake: firm, brief (two or three seconds), with eye contact and a smile, while you say “Nice to meet you.” Across a room, a wave. Hugs and kisses are for friends and family, and only where that is usual.
People from the UK, North America and Australia usually stand about an arm’s length apart with people they do not know well — further than in much of South Asia, the Middle East or Latin America. If somebody steps back, give them the space.
Hi, I’m Arjun. Nice to meet you. (With a handshake and a smile)
Sorry, am I standing too close? (A kind check)
A wave: Hello or goodbye, across a room or on a video call.
Hands at rest: Calm and ready. A good place for your hands to come back to between gestures.

A nod means yes and a shake of the head means no. The Indian head wobble, a gentle side-to-side tilt, means “yes”, “OK” or “I’m listening” in India, but people elsewhere may not know which: say the word as well. Point with an open hand, not a finger. Beckon with your whole hand, palm down or up, not one curled finger. The thumbs up and the “OK” circle are friendly in English-speaking countries but rude in some others, so say “Great!” or “OK” too.
Yes, absolutely. That works for us. (Say the yes as well as nodding)
It’s just over there. (With an open hand towards the place)
Open palms: Honest and inviting: “here is what I think”. The most useful gesture there is.
Pointing at someone: Accusing or aggressive in many cultures. Gesture with an open hand instead.
Thumbs up: Good, agreed, well done — in most English-speaking places. Rude in parts of the Middle East and West Africa.
A shrug: “I don’t know” or “it can’t be helped”. In a negotiation it can look as if you do not care.
Tip: When in doubt, say it in words. A gesture adds to your English; it never has to replace it.

Record a video of yourself greeting a new colleague: sit or stand up straight, smile, offer a handshake towards the camera, introduce yourself and ask one question. Then listen to their imagined answer for ten seconds, nodding and saying “I see”.
I looked at the camera, not the screen
I smiled when I said my name
My hand was open and forward for the handshake
I nodded and said a word while listening

FinClamp: skills, brain and play. About · Contact · Privacy · Terms